Chapter 6: Abiding

“Lord, what is this all about?” I told Him how I had been expecting a miraculous healing for Jack, and had actually envisioned him sitting right up in bed, totally healed! Was the Lord going to heal him through a miracle? Did He not want to use doctors? Did He, after 8½ hours of cracking the skull and probing inside, not want the doctor to touch the exact spot? Would it have ruptured during the process? Did He, who had guided the doctor’s hands, allow only the cleaning but not the touching? After all, we had prayed specifically for His guidance and wisdom.

That night, exhausted, I fell to my knees and asked God to forgive me for any doubt in my heart. It is easy to stand in perfect faith when you’re alone at home or in a prayer group. However, when you’re in the thick of the battle, seeing your loved one’s condition, the doctor’s frowns, and the constant monitoring of a life-and-death situation, it is very hard not to despair from time to time.

The whole ordeal had taken a toll on me both emotionally and physically. I confessed any lack of faith on my part and resolved that, no matter what the circumstances looked like or what the doctors predicted, I would look to His Truth, which states simply:

“He that dwelleth in the secret place of the most High shall abide under the shadow of the Almighty,”

“I am the Lord that Healeth thee,” and

“He shall call upon me, and I will answer him; I will be with him in trouble; I will deliver him, and honour him...with long life will I satisfy him, and show him my salvation” .

I stood on those three scriptures, speaking them over him every day. The word salvation, coming from the Greek word “Sozo” also means “healing” and “deliverance”. I was blessed that we did not have to rely on our faith alone. We were covered with prayer from an army of faith-filled brothers and sisters in Christ. The Word of God says that “having done all, stand!” In other words, The Lord heard our prayer the very first time; we just had to wait in expectation for the result to manifest itself.

A peace came over me and I thanked Him over and over again for His goodness, His love, His presence, His peace and all that He is. I thanked Him that Jack had come through the operation without any further complications, and reaffirmed Jack’s healing, telling Him that, however He was going to do it and no matter what the outcome, He would get the glory.

“It is a good thing to give thanks unto the Lord, and to sing praises unto thy name, O most High. To show forth thy lovingkindness in the morning, and thy faithfulness every night”.

My favorite place to pray was on Mount Royal! The hospital is built into the mountain; its main entrance on the 6th floor faces the mountain across the street, and its back entrance on the first floor overlooks the city. Those beautiful autumn days I would just cross Cedar Ave. and climb right up a winding path to a little knoll I had discovered with a spectacular panorama. It looked out right over top of the hospital onto parts of the city below astride the mighty St. Lawrence River and the South Shore beyond. It was a place where I could unwind and take some deep breaths, read the Word, pray, and nestle under His wings.

With Wings as Eagles

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